In this complex and chaotic world, socializing is like an invisible giant net, tightly binding us within it, making it hard to escape. However, for me, this net has gradually become heavy and oppressive, causing me to lose my direction in the noise.
Once upon a time, I was keen on chatting and laughing in QQ group chats, sharing bits of life with QQ friends. Those lively scenes seemed to be the source of my sense of belonging and the comfort of my soul. However, as time passed, I gradually realized that this so-called "belonging" and "liveliness" were merely superficial bubbles, easily burst.
On the stage of socializing, I tried my best to play various roles, attempting to cater to every smile and every round of applause. But behind this was my endless fatigue and inner struggle. I began to doubt, is this really the life I want? Is this truly the desire deep within my heart?
Finally, one day, I made a decision. I resolutely exited almost all QQ groups, deleted the majority of my QQ friends, and even disbanded the QQ group chat I had built myself. Those group chats and friends that once brought me brief laughter and a sense of belonging have now become an unspeakable pain and burden in my heart.
I know this is not just a simple farewell, but a profound reflection and reorientation of myself. In the time of solitude, I learned to listen to the voice within, to have conversations with myself. I began to try various ways to entertain myself, such as painting, listening to music, watching movies... These seemingly simple activities are like a clear spring, nourishing my parched heart, allowing me to regain inner peace and joy.
During the days of solitude, I gradually discovered my true self. I no longer need to rely on others' recognition to prove my worth, nor do I change myself to cater to others. I learned to appreciate and affirm myself, and I also learned to find extraordinary joy in the ordinary.
As for QQ, the software that once accompanied me through countless days and nights, I also plan to uninstall it sooner or later. It witnessed my laughter and tears and carried too many memories and attachments. But now I have found my own way of life and rhythm, no longer needing it to fill the emptiness within or as a tool to escape reality.
Of course, I also understand that completely disconnecting from socializing is impossible. But I have learned to choose my social circle more cautiously, only interacting with those who truly share my values and can understand and support me. Such social relationships are warm and comfortable, like a spring breeze, allowing me to feel true happiness and satisfaction.
Looking back, I am filled with emotion. I once lost my direction in the ocean of socializing; now, I feel like a butterfly breaking free from its cocoon, soaring in the sky that belongs to me. I have learned to entertain myself and to be my true self. In the days to come, I will continue to uphold my choices and live out the true meaning of my life in my own way!